Friday, October 24, 2014

Church Girls Vs. Cancer

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HOPE FOR BREAST CANCER

Ezekiel 16:6-14

6 “And when I passed by you and saw you struggling in your own blood, I said to you in your blood, ‘Live!’ Yes, I said to you in your blood, ‘Live!’ 7 I made you thrive like a plant in the field; and you grew, matured, and became very beautiful. Your breasts were formed, your hair grew, but you were naked and bare.
8 “When I passed by you again and looked upon you, indeed your time was the time of love; so I spread My wing over you and covered your nakedness. Yes, I swore an oath to you and entered into a covenant with you, and you became Mine,” says the Lord God.
9 “Then I washed you in water; yes, I thoroughly washed off your blood, and I anointed you with oil. 10 I clothed you in embroidered cloth and gave you sandals of badger skin; I clothed you with fine linen and covered you with silk. 11 I adorned you with ornaments, put bracelets on your wrists, and a chain on your neck. 12 And I put a jewel in your nose, earrings in your ears, and a beautiful crown on your head. 13 Thus you were adorned with gold and silver, and your clothing was of fine linen, silk, and embroidered cloth. You ate pastry of fine flour, honey, and oil. You were exceedingly beautiful, and succeeded to royalty. 14 Your fame went out among the nations because of your beauty, for it was perfect through My splendor which I had bestowed on you,” says the Lord God.



Christian Chicks with Cancer




Sunday, October 19, 2014

FAMILY & FRIENDS DAY!!! OCT 19TH @11:30AM

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FAITH, FAMILY, & FUN!!

"FROM SITCOMS TO THE SANCTUARY!"

WHAT IS YOUR FAMILY TYPE?

FIND OUT TODAY @ 11:30AM!


                   http://www.withoutatraceministries.com/family-and-friends-day/


Saturday, October 18, 2014

TONIGHT!!!! CLAY MAKING & WORSHIP! For Women Only!

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Come & Join Us for Clay-Making & Worship for Women!

Tonight @ 6pm!

$20 At the Door!


http://gmksbeyond.com/event-registration/

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

The Single Series (Pt.5) Men's Edition

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"Being Her Future, & not Just the Man that takes her to Dinner (the Back-Up Plan)!"




Men are not the only creatures on earth that can run game or even be manipulative, and conniving. There are some women who absolutely mean you no good and only want to use you until Mr. Right comes along. You are far too good a man to be anybody’s Mr. Right Now. You too deserve to be with someone who loves you for you, and wants to be with only you.

Know the signs…She’s Just Not that Into You
  •          She shows you no respect.
  •          She Is not nurturing towards your needs.
  •          She Lies to you!
  •          She Only asks for money.
  •          She Only calls when she needs something.
  •          She Does not want to spend any alone time with you.

**Have some real standards and expectations (nothing unachievable), and also not anything that you are not yet or willing to become. Take time now so that you have a plan and an outlook so you can make a sound decision in 90-days if you should stay or leave. If you don’t know what you want and expect, then that woman will not either.


#1 What are you desiring or looking for in a woman? Be specific and realistic.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
                       
           
#2 What does a godly relationship look like to you? How do expect to be treated/respected, what standards need to be set and lived-out through this relationship?

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


#3 Where/What level are you on as it relates to commitment? What level of commitment do you want from a woman?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________



#4 Where does she need to be financially, educationally, & spiritually? Even deal with her physical attributes, what you like/desire.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

#5 What past issues are you willing to or not willing to accept (divorce, kids, incarceration, former addictions to drugs, alcoholism, former lifestyle of lesbianism, etc…)
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________



The copyrighted materials from this teaching are excerpts from author Tashara Luster’s soon to be released book: THE TOTAL SINGLE
Copyright. ©Tashara Luster. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed without consent.


Tuesday, October 14, 2014

The Single Series (Pt.4) Men's Edition

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What Men Say…

That Turns Women Off!



Pick up lines get you left behind and without a woman with good sense to believe what you just said. No woman wants you to state the obvious. No woman wants you to only know and want her for her beauty alone. A woman wants a man interested in her and most of all ready for the love she has to offer, and one who is ready to receive.

Women live for honesty and you should tell her up front once you get to know her and realize that this is only a friendship. If there is no potential, then don’t make her just some “plaything,” a woman wants a man that will treat her right and talk to her the way she deserves. Let a woman know if you are Better as a memory than as her man. Real Men Don’t Lie to Women that They Claim & Profess to Love!

When you lie to a woman, then you are allowing her to build a safety net out of a fantasy. A man is only as good as his word. That is all that you have sometimes, your word, which is the core of who you are. Women love to be told they are beautiful, but no woman wants to feel you are only with her for her looks.  As men, you must learn to love without unobtainable physical expectations. Love a woman as is!

Women hate when men pretend to be something that they are not. The difference is that women are focused when they date and are really seeking to know with clarity if the man in her life is the one. Just like with a man¸ women too want to be sure when dating someone. Women hate when men move too slow or not at all as it relates to commitment.


The Words of Men that Women Despise:

Lies, Lies, Lies!
  •          “You know I love you right? Words without actions!”
  •          “When I get myself together, then we will make this thing happen.”
  •          “You will never find another man like me.”
  •          “There is a whole line of women waiting to be with me.”
  •          “If you really loved me, you would sleep with me.”
  •         “I am separated from my wife, so I am available to date you.”
  •          “I live at home with my mom.”
  •          “I go to church sometimes, I am not really into the whole God thing.”


The copyrighted materials from this teaching are excerpts from author Tashara Luster’s soon to be released book: THE TOTAL SINGLE
Copyright. ©Tashara Luster. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed without consent.



Monday, October 13, 2014

Family & Friends Day!! OCTOBER 19TH 2014

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FAITH, FAMILY, & FUN!!!!

From Sitcoms to the Sanctuary!

The Single Series (Pt.3) Men's Edition

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The Love Language of a Woman



A woman speaks love through her words, warmth, and actions. No matter how much a woman loves, the old saying is true… “There is a thin line between love and hate!” A man who doesn’t love a good woman right, can literally make her mad and mean at the same time. It is a real thing that “Hell Hath No Fury Like A Woman Scorned!” I will admit that women sometimes have unrealistic expectations, demands, and needs that we think that you as our man should fulfill. No one other than God can do it all! This is something that this book serves notice to every woman and man reading this book. Know what God’s role is, and then know what your spouse’s role is in your life. Remember, Love is a choice, so choose it daily!
                                                                                       

The Five Areas of Love:

  •  Spirituality
  • Actions/Acts of Service & Gratitude:
  • Communication: Time Together, Quality Time!
  • Physical Affection/Touch:
  • Romantic Gestures/Affirming Words: Security & Support


**All women want you to know this about their Success: “I need to know it is ok for me to be successful, you are not envious of me or competing with me, the check comes home to the both of us regardless of who makes it.”



What a Woman Needs

Most men think that women have needs that are as long as the alphabet. Not true, but there are some basic needs that women have and that men are capable of fulfilling. I think you will find that you too desire these needs and that you will also take pleasure in meeting these needs for your woman. She has to be your priority after God, nothing else matters to her, but this is paramount for the marriage to work!

                                                           
A Woman Needs a Man Who Is:

A Spiritual Leader:
-Submitted to God
-A man who prays, fast, & attends worship/church services regularly
-One who has a personal relationship with God, one who seeks daily to have a stronger relationship with God
-One who sets order and vision for the household
-One who walks out the call of God on their life
-A compliment ministry partner
-A warrior during adversities
-Non-prideful who has humility
-Forgiving
-Able to overcome tragedies/adversities
-A Protector, defender of honor(name/reputation, and privacy)
-Visionary (has life goals)


A Lover/Best Friend:
-Willing to speak her love language
-Understanding
-Seeks to please her
-Who is verbally intimate/romantic
-Able to express himself freely
-Great Companionship
-Seeks to meet her physical needs as a woman. A man that is not selfish in only getting his needs meet, but seeks to please her in the marriage bed. It is your behavior outside the bedroom in your everyday routine and consideration of me, this dictates my willingness, desire, and behavior in the bedroom…*For further info please see the upcoming book The Total Marriage J
-Dates her, takes her out, and is not ashamed of her
-Loves unconditionally
-Makes her his partner/teammate…not a maid/doormat
- Very Chivalrous/Southern Gentleman with charm and charisma
-Thoughtful: calls texts, emails, send flowers…surprises, picnics, getaways… not just buy, but make me something
-Displays pictures of them at the office
-Spontaneous, thinks outside the box, adventurous
-Cherishes/Respects her
-Passionate/Zealous

A Provider:
-A tither, sower, and giver
-Financially responsible
-Incorporates her in business matters
-Provides for his family
-Generous: treats her well/spoils her within reason of his finances

A Great Communicator:
-Long-suffering
-Patient and kind
-Controlled anger
-Tells me when I am wrong
-Teach me what I don’t know
-Tell me what you need
-Father me
-Comfort me
-Let me in to your fears, hopes, dreams, tell me about your past, your disappointments
-Resolves conflict effectively and immediately
-Able to confront issues
-Open to counseling
-Open to suggestions
-One who does not lie, ever!
-Discuss all aspects of the relationship freely
-Always tries, effort is everything
-Listens!
-Tell me what angers you, makes you tick
-Make me laugh
-Compliment me

A Godly/Loving Father to my Children…Family Commitment
-Family First!
-Meets our children emotional needs
-Supports and initiates family activities
-Disciplinarian
-godly example
-Not a work alcoholic
-Dedicated to family time (dinner, activities, school projects, etc…)


The copyrighted materials from this teaching are excerpts from author Tashara Luster’s soon to be released book: THE TOTAL SINGLE
Copyright. ©Tashara Luster. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed without consent.



Friday, October 10, 2014

The Single Series (Pt.2) Men's Edition

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The Mindset of A Woman




This section of the book is inspired from the movie, “What Women Want.” Mel Gibson takes on the role of trying to go into the female brain in this funny, yet thought provoking film. In the film, Mel Gibson is electrocuted while trying on various items that are designed for women, in order to know what women wanted; he felt it imperative to get into the mind of women by doing this. He was a marketing director over the female line at his company and wanted to do his best by trying to understand the female anatomy as it relates to their mind, needs, and wants.

After being electrocuted, he is able to hear the thoughts of every woman that he encounters. With this gift, he felt unstoppable and as if he was the most powerful man on the earth. Little did he know how this journey would cause him to become a better man in the area of a great companion, father, and friend. Now, you don’t have to electrocute yourself in order to know what a woman’s thought pattern is as it relates to our: needs, desires, and wants from you as a man. A woman wants you to be a good godly man, faithful husband, a great lover, the priest/head of the home, and a good father to your children.
           
            Actually, I could just sum it up in one sentence and be done with this chapter, but I want to be detailed (imagine that, a woman wanting to be detailed)! Too many times, men give women what they do not need. The mindset of a woman as it relates to men is, “To give me what I can’t give myself, which is you, all of you!” For example: She might be able to pay her bills, but she can’t hug herself. She might be able to do a lot on her own, but a woman needs you to provide and do for her what she can’t. Be the missing piece of the puzzle.


The copyrighted materials from this teaching are excerpts from author Tashara Luster’s soon to be released book: THE TOTAL SINGLE
Copyright. ©Tashara Luster. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed without consent.


Thursday, October 9, 2014

The Single Series (Pt.1) Men's Edition

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Act Like A Christian Gentleman, Think Like A Christian Woman



“And in that day seven women shall take hold of one man, saying, We will eat our own bread and provide our own apparel; only let us be called by your name to take away our reproach [of being unmarried]” (Isaiah 4:1 AMP).

            I definitely want to deal with what women really think about love, relationships, intimacy, and commitment, but first, I think it paramount to deal with the behavior of men. A woman is going to love you regardless, but what about your behavior needs to be examined and changed as it relates to a woman.

In the previous chapter, I dealt with the complexities of The Investment vs. the Return. No one invests in anything without expecting a return. The issue of most relationships is the dilemma of The Investment vs. The Return.

Most women invest their time, love, support, heart, and commitment of whatever it takes to make a relationship work. Even when they know that the man is not fully into the relationship, women even make up for a man’s shortcomings. Women feel that if they deposit so much love then there has to be some type of return. But my brothers, you are able to continually make withdrawals from the Love Bank and never put in a deposit. Today, this stops! Men, you will not rob another woman of her heart, patience, love, and commitment to you. Too many men are carrying around a part of a woman that they need to return. No more playboy, but it is time to be God’s man.

            At some point, men stop believing that the woman is a gift. Society wants men to think that women are some type of sexual commodity. I want to shift the mindset of the men reading this book to go back to God’s original plan of how you were supposed to treat, love, protect, provide, and lead a woman. Many men would say, “Minister Tashara, I don’t know how to do those things, because no one has shown me how!” This book is the place to learn how to Act Like A Christian Gentleman.

What is a Gentleman? Defined as being a man who is polite, considerate, courteous, gracious, and honorable.  A civilized, educated, sensitive, and well-mannered man. A male attendant upon a king, queen, or other royal person, who is himself of high birth or rank. A man characterized by consideration and courtesy, especially toward women. Before you can act like a gentleman to a woman, you need to be this way to yourself. Remember, where you come from, you were created in the image and likeness of God. The definition of a gentleman, deals with the status/rank given at birth, that of royalty. You are royalty! You are God’s son (a Prince). When your behavior is anything less than royal, then you are not only mistreating your woman, but you are disrespecting yourself, and God (the Creator) who created you in His likeness and image.
           
            The woman is the reflection of the man, so to treat her badly is to treat yourself badly also. So, “How should a Gentleman act as it relates to a woman?” He should act as if she is a gift from God. “For man is not from woman, but woman from man. 9Nor was man created for the woman, but woman for the man” (1 Corinthians 11:8-9).

The Bible says, that the woman was created for you, especially for you, she is your gift! You would not misuse a gift, so don’t misuse women. How you act, sets the tone for the relationship. When you are out of order, then the whole relationship is out of order. Take time to evaluate your behaviors and actions of your past relationships. Really take inventory of your behavior as it relates to how you have mistreated women that you have dated. If she is not the one, then move on and let her go so someone who is ready to love her can. Don’t be that man who keeps a woman around because he is not ready and doesn’t want anyone else to have her either.

*Write out 3-5 things that you know you need to change as it relates to how you Treat women:

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________




The copyrighted materials from this teaching are excerpts from author Tashara Luster’s soon to be released book: THE TOTAL SINGLE
Copyright. ©Tashara Luster. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed without consent.

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

The Single Series (Pt.5) Women's Edition

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Becoming A Man’s Future

Not Just His Option for Now



First things first, once there is an establishment that this could possibly be a promising relationship, the most paramount question to ask a man is, “What are you Intentions as it relates to Me and this relationship?” Point blank! If you are too scared to ask then you put yourself at the mercy of just casting your hope to the wind and not having a definitive outlook on your future as it relates to this relationship.
                                                                                  
Every day, be a woman who looks like a future and not a “right now option.” What I am talking about does not only or merely speak of your outward appearance, but rather your character, standards, and self-respect. “Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— 4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God” (1 Peter 3:3-4).
                                                                                                  
We as women, have to get to the place called Incorruptible Beauty! This beauty carries a gentle spirit, godly character, and this is what God honors. If you are still trying to obtain a man by the physical beauty of your body, then you are a “right now option” and not a future to a man. He may have fun with you, but he will not marry you. If you possess the Incorruptible Beauty, that which does not wash off and perish with age, then you are a future to a man because he can see his future in you. The Incorruptible Beauty is the mirror that a man can look into and see the reflection of the man he can be through you and the favor of God on your life.
           
            Don’t forget the Power of being A Woman…You set the atmosphere of the relationship. You don’t have to settle, when you are the gift. Steve in his book has this 90-day Rule that deals with benefits. Now, we have already covered that if we are living holy, there is no sex whatsoever! I want to put a spin on the 90-day rule and deal with it from the standpoint of after 90-days, you should know where you stand. Ironically, I have for years, also used 3 months as my rule of thumb of knowing if I needed to move on from someone if they were not serious about a committed relationship.
           
            The 90-day Rule: If he has not given you an indication of where the relationship is going by now, then he is not serious about a relationship, or not that into you. It is time to go, it only takes 90-days for a man looking to be serious to decide if he is going to be with you or not. He’s not drawing it out, but you are letting him. A man can only do to you, what you allow him too. Be with someone who is ready for what you have to offer. If he is the one, he will become the man you need him to be.

            Have some real standards and expectations (nothing unachievable), and also not anything that you are not yet willing to become. Take time now so that you have a plan and an outlook and can make a sound decision in 90-days if you should stay or leave. If you don’t know what you want and expect, then that man will not either.


#1 What are you desiring or looking for in a man? Be specific and realistic.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
                       



#2 What does a godly relationship look like to you? How do expect to be treated, and what standards need to be set and lived-out through this relationship?

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

#3 Where/What level are you on as it relates to commitment? What level of commitment do you want from a man?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

#4 Where does he need to be financially, educationally, & spiritually? Even deal with his physicality, what you like/desire.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

#5 What past issues are you willing to or not willing to accept (divorce, kids, former incarceration, former addictions to drugs, alcoholism, or a former lifestyle of homosexuality, etc…)
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________



The copyrighted materials from this teaching are excerpts from author Tashara Luster’s soon to be released book: THE TOTAL SINGLE
Copyright. ©Tashara Luster. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed without consent.


Tuesday, October 7, 2014

The Single Series (Pt.4) Women's Edition

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What Women Say…

Why Men Run!




Remember that all verbal communication is not what you say, but how you say it as well. There is a way that you have to talk to a man. Their egos (no matter their front/pretending) are very fragile.  Particularly when in marriage,  you have to remember when you address your husband, he is the head. What you are saying to him, believe me God is listening too! So, if you would not talk to God  (your superior head), your boss (job head), or even your pastor (church head) that way, why are you so harshly dealing with your husband (spiritual covering, protector, provider, and lover) this way? “Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband” (1 Corinthians 7:3).

The Bible commands us to render unto our spouses due benevolence and this means in our words to them also (1 Corinthians 7:3). Remember words precede actions! So what are your words saying your actions will be?  Now, back to you as single woman and how you need to put into practice now how you deal with and speak to the men in your life.

           
Phrases and Things Women  that Scare Men Away:

  •          We Need to Talk!
  •          I Am Un-Happy!
  •          You Need to ________________.
  •          If Only You were More Like ___________.
  •          You would be a Better Man if You__________________
  •          I Demand that You_______________.
  •          I don’t need a Man!
  •          You Ain’t No Good!
  •          I Really Need A Man (desperation).
  •          My Biological Clock is Ticking!
  •          Commit or else (the ultimatum)
  •          I am Mad at you!

This is not an exhaustive list, but you can ask your own man what you do and say that hurts him. It is not helping him, if it is hurting him! Then follow-up by asking him, “How can I address issues in our relationship better?” If you normally scream, then try talking softer, or writing a letter, and most of all pray first before you confront. You must evaluate yourself first, and then deal with the other person. Men cannot handle or deal with overly emotional and overly involved conversations. You can’t lay ten (10) issues on them and expect them to be able to deal with them all. Really, ask yourself, “How major is this issue?” And, “What can I do first to make it better?” Take it one issue at a time.

In all honesty, men hate to see a woman hurt or mad at them, and they will go to any length to make what’s wrong right. Men don’t like problems in relationships, so that is mainly why they don’t deal with them, but rather hope they will just work themselves out or go away. They want to fix them, so men deal with the approach of, “How can we fix this problem in our relationship?” A man doesn’t like to feel you have the answers and all you want to do is tell him how to change, but rather that you need his input to making the relationship successful. Afterwards, allow him to tell you about some things that you need to fix within yourself to make the relationship better. Make him feel at ease with expressing himself.


The copyrighted materials from this teaching are excerpts from author Tashara Luster’s soon to be released book: THE TOTAL SINGLE
Copyright. ©Tashara Luster. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed without consent.

Monday, October 6, 2014

The Single Series (Pt.3) Women's Edition

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Needs of A Man



Now in Steve’s book his says a man needs Support, Loyalty, and the Cookie (sex). He says that is it, these are the basic needs of a man. I agree and even after asking some men, they too believe this sums it up. Notice, I said sums it up! Men say the most they can with the least amount of words they can. Women on the other hand, of course, are wordy creatures, who need details.

A man needs support, kind words, encouragement, respect, honor, the position of being the head even if you do make all the decisions! A man needs to feel needed and wanted. He wants to feel desired as a sexual being as well. Again (I reiterate), this is only in marriage that this need is to be met by you, remember you are living/dating holy! 

            A real man does not want you to provide for him, but take care of him. Take care of his emotional, and physical/sexual needs. He appreciates a clean home, a home-cooked meal, ironed shirts, kids with good manners, and most importantly, you praying for him on a daily basis. He must be able to trust you. He needs to know you will always be there no matter what. A man has to know that you are glad that he is your man. Men need physical affection (just like us, even though they don’t admit it).

Men love to be touched in non-sexual ways. They are visual creatures and are driven in their physical nature. In a dating relationship (a holy one), there must be clear biblical boundaries in this arena of physicality. However, in marriage have fun, go for it, don’t hold back, and release your inner inhibitions in making love to your spouse. Sex is not a necessity for life survival (it is not water or food), but to a man sex is a need for a surviving/thriving successful marriage. Again, in this book, I want to deal with dating that prepares you for real marriage, but let me be clear, if you ain’t married, then you can’t do what the married can!

Your Man Needs:

  •          Affirming and kind words from you.
  •       You to understand that sometimes there is absolutely nothing on his mind, so stop asking, “What are thinking about, over and over again!”
  •          Quiet/Alone time to process; he is not shutting you out.
  •          To feel comfortable in the world of your emotions.
  •          For you to Forgive him, always!
  •          Patience from you for his imperfections.
  •         For you not to be eternally angry with him or hold a grudge forever.


The copyrighted materials from this teaching are excerpts from author Tashara Luster’s soon to be released book: THE TOTAL SINGLE
Copyright. ©Tashara Luster. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed without consent.